Hello, I just now am revisiting this site after leaving it dormant for...one year?!?
Not sure why I haven't felt the need to post until now, but let's say I've been in 'doing' mode more than 'reflecting' mode the past 12 months.
And life has certainly changed.
It's fascinating to be on this journey...of F.A.I.T.H. which a friend once told me stands for "A Fantastic Adventure In Trusting Him." I would never have imagined I would be writing to you from Los Angeles, having left my 'high-powered' job and past in New York City - to come and live with my family and pursue a totally different career path.
It's been difficult, don't get me wrong. I'm still struggling daily with a sense of calling, and wondering where this will all lead; but I am glad. Glad to have been lifted out of the rut I was in while I was living in NyC. I mean, everything was great on "paper" but in reality, my heart and spirit felt all wrong - I knew I was living out a false self - too afraid to step out of the walls of achievement, status, etc. I had built around myself to see what might lie underneath.
Anyway, I won't go into too much detail here - but I am writing to say hello. Perhaps more to myself than to you, the reader.
Hello, and good. I love my life. It's filled with a different set of challenges than before. It's in some ways a lot harder. But I know this is where I am supposed to be.
Thank you, God. For being so faithful. For being with me and knowing me better than I know myself.
I have a deep hunger for truth, for living authentically, and out of a deeper identity in you, rather than what the world says is right. As a result, I'm moving down the ladder of achievement, but never have I felt more satisfied and fulfilled...
There are many more areas where I need to grow - ironically, the older I get, in some ways, the younger I feel - the more awed by how much there is to still learn.
Someone asked me the other day in a party setting, 'what do you aspire to be?' We all went around and said what it is we aspired to be...and I realized that what I aspired to be was something so completely at odds with anything that I had aspired to be in the past, I surprised even myself when I blurted out the answer.
It was more of an impulse comment, and I will leave it at that for now. But hopefully in the coming weeks and months it will all take shape and you will see yourself, reader (and me! lol) what this is all coming to be.
God, you are the creator and maker of all things good. I pray that I would be more obedient to you, loving, patient, filled with the fruits of the Spirit and FAITHFUL. Yes, Faithful. trusting in your plan.
God bless!
